Is My Penis Too Small?

Fri, 04/28/2017 - 06:23
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty

I might not have such a special problem, it seems like there are questions sort of like mine all over the internet, but few people take it seriously or they take a PC approach to everything to the point they just totally dissmiss the posters questions. The people who answer seem to be more worried about their reputation and how their answer will be seen or thought of, rather than speaking the truth about things.

My problem is that I have a very small penis. It's 4 inches long and 3.5 inches around when erect. I have been told some very confusing things about my size and would like your opinions about it. My first question is: Is my penis too thin to break/tear a womans hyman? I've slept with a lady who said she was a virgin but after we had sex, there was no bleeding and she said it wasn't uncomfortable or anything, then we realized..she was still a virgin, we did it several more times and still the same story.

Later, i was with another woman and she told me I was probably too thin. Also, I can't wear condoms, but that's another story I guess. The other thing I've been told a couple of times is that my penis is comparible to a tampon.

I don't live with anyone, so finding a tampon to compare to isn't easy. I've also not been interested in buying any just to see. But based on my measurments, is this true? There isn't a lot of information about the demensions of them on the internet. Also, I've been told several times that women can't feel me. That they really can't tell if it's in or not. Are they just exagerating? I can't imagine it to be literally true.

Thank you so much,

Dear D,

Yes, you have a very small penis but you know that. You should also know that a finger used masterfully can be delightful and a big penis thrusting inside the vagina rarely gives a woman an orgasm. Her clitoris is her primary sex organ for pleasure and it's much smaller than a small penis. But if you apply organic massage oil to your fingers and skillfully stimulate her clitoris gently, you will be known as a "good lover" by her and by others, but not by women who love a big penis.

Should you hook up with a gal who likes to get fucked, become a smart lesbian and have several sized dildos. You could even strap on a big one but I find there is more control by holding the dildo in hand. Forget about tampons for comparison. Get skilled using your hands, tongue and sex toys on a well oiled clitoris.

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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penis size a la Kama Sutra

Sun, 04/30/2017 - 19:48
bila kolbe

Dear D, There are small, narrow penises and shallow, narrow vaginas, extra long penises and extra deep vaginas. Such is the variety of human anatomy, the question is to find a mate who corresponds to you physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. The Kama Sutra speaks to the different dimensions of male and female genitalia and recommends sex among participants of similar dimension. Betty does well in recommending you develop skills stimulating the clitoris. Whether you want to supplement your penis with sex toys is your choice. I would suggest you investigate the many intercourse positions appropriate for your equipment. Bottom line: love yourself, be your best lover, masturbate edging orgasms, love your cock. If you'd like a unique perspective on masturbation, check out my website-
Journey well,

Hi D Yes at 4 inchs your not

NOWHARD's picture
Thu, 05/04/2017 - 13:50

Hi D Yes at 4 inchs your not very long and your girth is not great to say the least.

So what can you do to improve your manhood, look go and have a look round the pe stands for penis enlargment and yes it can be done.
But its not a quick fix to get good gains it does take time, so be prepared for
the long haul, if you go this way, your find lots of help on the, a guy called Big Al
is the real guy to get under his wing if you can.

A warning do just follow what you are told to do and how to do it, never go off track,
do that you could end up with ED even if its only temporary and these little hic-cups
dont help, so your warned.OK

But its worked for me and can still gain at nearly 70? why well we all need a hobby.


Too small for what? You're

Sun, 05/14/2017 - 07:41

Too small for what? You're not going to be a porn star with your penis size but unless that's a career you were looking for, you don't have a problem.

For most women, clitoral stimulation is what leads to orgasm so a man's penis is entirely irrelevant to her pleasure. Even for women who like the feeling of being "full" there are plenty of toys available. 

Most women's hymens are long gone by the time they hit their teens, thankfully, so the old wives' tale about blooding virgins is no longer relevant. Both penis size and vagina size vary considerably so everyone at some stage is going to come across a "mis-match". The women who have commented on the size of your dick would be horrified if you'd commented on their possibly cavernous vaginas so just accept that some people are rude and selfish, and take no notice.

As long as your penis gives you pleasure, it's doing it's job. Give a choice between a man with a huge penis and no skills, most of us are going to choose the skills so just find someone to practice with and enjoy life.

Hi NLH 4 inchs erect you must

NOWHARD's picture
Sun, 05/14/2017 - 10:35

Hi NLH 4 inchs erect you must agree is small, I think he can gain 2 inchs and that would help his esteem in manhood.

I think a 4 inch penis is a bit like a women having a 32a bra size, and always hiding it from site, so if she wanted to be bigger what would you say to her?

He does not want to be a porn star he just wants it a bit bigger, that way he saves face just like a 32a going to a 36b would help to save face, saves depression they get, its that side you really need to be looking at, PE works for me at nearly 70 as my wife enjoys a little extra size, so if a can and do and it does work.

Question would you be happy being in bed with a guy who can only raise 4 inchs erect and not much thicker than a standard candle?

And its also a locker room thing, again saving face.


everybody's hard dick feels good

Sun, 05/14/2017 - 14:29
bila kolbe

Now Nowhard, Why do have your genitals censored in your author pic? Not necessary in a forum like this, where love for ourselves, our bodies, our genitalia trumps any type of mindset where small infers lack, and where lack brings shame. No matter if his dick is 4 or 14 inches long, a stimulated erection produces unique euphoric states mentally and physically in solo and paired sexual activity. Everybody's hard dick feels good, they're all buzzing with sexual energy. There's no other feeling quite like it in our sensory menu. We are all by nature sexual beings, by birthright, not by some edict that mandates 'size matters' as a key for sexual enjoyment. 

Skills over size

Mon, 05/15/2017 - 11:18

I'd rather have a partner with skills than one with the biggest dick, which obviously comes with it's own issues and can be uncomfortable for partnersex.

But I think maybe you've answered the question for yourself when you suggest it's all about the locker room. Mostly dick size is all about other men, not about women and their expectations for partnersex at all which is somewhat ironic given how hyper hetero comments relating to size can sometimes pretend to be.

Asexual thoughts?

Mon, 05/15/2017 - 11:39

My daughters tell me that I need to make space in my thoughts for the idea of asexuality as a valid part of the sexual pantheon and I was wondering what your thoughts were on that topic. My initial response to my girls was that we're all sexual beings, which was shot down with full teenage righteousness.


Mon, 05/15/2017 - 16:05
bila kolbe

Something that came to mind when asked about asexuality, out of all the fairly circumscribed (or circumsized) attempts at understanding it, there remains much contentious debate about how to define it. Nature and nurture mold each one of us uniquely within their matrices formed by DNA and our social interactions. For some reason, people lose their sex drive, lose interest in sexual activity, is asexuality a sexual orientation? Whatever.  Were asexuals to ever entertain a return to some sexual activity, their respective sexual equipment, by nature, would work accordingly. By that I mean we are all sexual beings by nature, we have genitalia designed for sexual as well as other functions. 

Mine is 6 inches, not small.

Mon, 07/31/2017 - 21:03
Soda (not verified)

Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics

Hi Sorry is that a bone

NOWHARD's picture
Sat, 08/12/2017 - 09:18

Hi Sorry is that a bone pressed erection length 6 inchs, seems more like a 5 to me after seeing a few.

Try looking on at the photos your see what I mean, but join and enjoy some exercising you could if you want become an 8, but its not a quick fix takes time to get some good improvements, but your find its well worth doing it. OK


Is my penis too small

Mon, 11/13/2017 - 12:48
WeeD (not verified)

Im a small guy of 4.5 inches. Saying your penis is small is objectively correct. Calling it too small is a judgement that any woman is entitled to make re her personal preference. Most are unlikely to be so direct and undiplomatic.
Being too small for her doesn't reflect on you in any way. Nor does it question you masculinity.
I have to take care during penetrative sex to find a surface to stimulate. Just pounding straight in and out, barely touching her is unsatisfying for women in my experience, although doggy style is nice and tight.
I have discussed size with a couple of my partners in the past. both agreed that sex is different with a larger penis(than mine!). One of them (My current love) told me that she has had a good stretching, and she enjoyed it, but that she wasn't that bothered by my small size. As she said I'm lucky she has good muscle tone.
So yes you may be too small for some, others will see you as more than a penis, and some will be completely not concerned by your size at all.
Don't get fixated by size, make the best of what you have, and enjoy life. Your attidude and confidence re your sexual encounters will have more bearing on the outcome than the size of your equipment, most of the time.