How Do I Explore the Bi Side of Myself/Let Him Explore the Bi Side of Himself?

Wed, 05/09/2018 - 07:42
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

I am a 27 year old biquestioning woman who is dating a wonderful 22 year old bi Man. Previously for him, all of his relationships have been with other gay men, and he has presented to most people as a gay man. When he started dating me, it was the first "cishet" relationship he'd ever had, but we've made it work through lots of communication and we both feel quite strongly towards each other.

Recently he asked me about potentially starting an open relationship, as he said that there were "aspects of the gay world [he] wants to explore." Additionally, he knows that I am questioning my bi status and how that works with my commitment to him, and is almost encouraging me to explore that as well, within our relationship.

The thing I am afraid of, is that I don't know how I feel about it all. I've sat with it and although I can accept his desires for men and his need to seek that, I'm unsure if it will make me jealous, or make me resent the other potential person in our relationship. I've made the decision that I'm only really ever committed to one person at a time and that he is it for how do I explore the bi side of myself/let him explore the bi side of himself?

So Confused :(

Dear Confused,

You really can't "think" your way through this. You will "know" how you feel about all that once you actually have the experience.

You can't force him to do something he's not willing to do. That is to be exclusive by only having sex with you.

If you can't emotionally handle that, then move along and find a partner who wants to go steady.

Dr Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time