Carlin Ross's blog

The Next Bodysex Workshops

Thu, 09/14/2017 - 07:01
Submitted by Carlin Ross

Taking a bodysex workshop is transformative.  We focus on overcoming negative body image and pleasure anxiety. 

Yes, they're done in the nude but it's not sexual.  Betty developed these workshops using the consciousness raising model of second wave feminism where women got together and shared their experience first person. You can read about past workshops to better understand the experience here (scroll down to read blog posts written by Carlin and our Bodysex leaders).

Whatever your race, orientation, upbringing, or country of origin, we have wounds to heal. All are welcome.

The next workshops will be held Fall 2018 on these dates. It's a two day workshop:

Bodysex Certification

Thu, 11/17/2016 - 15:00
Submitted by Carlin Ross

If you have any questions or would like to start the certification process, send an email to admin@dodsonandross.com

Mission:

Our goal is to certify women to hold their own Bodysex workshops so that the Betty Dodson method of self-love and sisterhood continues and expands to every country around the world.

When Betty and I first got together, we had this vision of a world map with red lights being illuminated every time someone clicked on D&R. Now we feel that those red lights represent women certified in the Betty Dodson method as each woman holds her own Bodysex workshops.

Working Through Painful Penetration

Thu, 02/25/2016 - 20:02
Submitted by Carlin Ross

I've always been a size queen and I've always been able to penetrate my vagina with ease. When women would share their stories of pain during penetration and how it affected their lives, I couldn't relate...until after I gave birth.

Despite opting for a midwife and choosing a birthing center, I ended up having a C-section. Grayson weighed in at 9 pounds. I thought I could control the weight of my baby by limiting my weight gain during pregnancy. WRONG. I gained 15 pounds but he was huge. There was simply no way I could have had a vaginal birth.

Our Latest Ebook & Vulva Anatomy

Wed, 02/13/2013 - 17:22
Submitted by Carlin Ross

I'm really focused on ebooks right now because it's the easiest way for us to get our information out globally and keep the lights on.  Betty's memoir My Romantic Love Wars is out as an ebook and we're releasing several how-to sex ebooks including my first writing venture

The Range of Vulva Styles

Mon, 09/24/2012 - 13:43
Submitted by Carlin Ross

Betty sketched these vulvas for the release of her international best seller Sex for One.

Back in the 70's, during the Genital Show & Tell ritual in her Bodysex workshops, Betty started identifying the "style" of each vulva using architectural styles as a reference.

Scarleteen and Planned Parenthood have reproduced these images for their educational content.  Knowing that there is a range of vulva types has healed millions of women and men.

Classical

It Was a Weekend of Connection

Fri, 06/22/2018 - 08:28
Submitted by Carlin Ross

We've been quiet. I've been working on the relaunch of D&R (which is weeks away from being done), finalizing our mobile site, closing out our Bodysex season while preparing for our Fall groups, and being a mom.

Personally, I've lost almost all interest in social media. I used to love promoting new content and posting our youtube clips but something changed for me. Net neutrality - dead. Safe online spaces for sex workers - dead. Fake news, racism, and state-sponsored cruelty - alive and well. It feels like a constant dick whipping. As I labor to raise a sex positive, happy son, I wonder whether we'll ever see the end of toxic masculinity.

The Bodysex Effect Deepens & Grows the Longer You Do the Work

Fri, 05/04/2018 - 08:54
Submitted by Carlin Ross

This past weekend's workshop added eleven more women to our certification team or, as Betty calls it, her "All Woman Orgasm Army".

Usually, I can write up the workshop within a day or two but this time I needed almost a week to process everything that happened, everything that I felt. It was the most profound circle we've ever had....ever. What I came to realize, is that the Bodysex effect deepens and grows the longer you do the work.

I'd Gone Through the Emotional Wheel & Come Back to Selflove

Sun, 04/15/2018 - 11:25
Submitted by Carlin Ross

When you get a call from your doctor and hear the words "rule out melanoma", everything stops. Your heart starts to race. They hang up and you start googling medical jargon which is the worst thing to do in that moment.

I've been here on D&R but unable to put pen to paper for a few weeks. The two rounds of excisions and waiting for the biopsies shut me down emotionally. It wasn't melonoma but that slight brush with the big "C" aroused so many feelings - for the first time in my life - I was fearful of the future.

Because Bad Girls Say No

Tue, 03/13/2018 - 08:16
Submitted by Carlin Ross

We have this cultural myth that if we leave young girls in the dark about their bodies, deny the clitoris, and shame them against sexual experimentation (thank you virginity myth & slut stigma) that they will remain chaste and only have intercourse when they're married. The sexual double standard has always been about limiting female sexual activity.

New research has found that sexually experienced women - women who valued their sexual pleasure - were more likely to say no to unwanted sexual contact while inexperienced women were more likely to engage in unwanted sexual contact. In other words, bad girls say no and good girls say yes.

Bodysex in Harper's Bazaar

Thu, 03/08/2018 - 08:50
Submitted by Carlin Ross

We've had several media outlets cover Bodysex but yesterday's piece in Harper's Bazaar is the best one yet. 

The images are perfection especially the vulva diagram with the clitoris front and center.  When fashion magazines are publishing this sort of sex ed content, expressly for women, it makes you tingle.  We are at a tipping point and this new wave of feminism is a fucking tsunami.

This is my favorite passage because it speaks to our orgasm expectations.  Thank you, Suzannah, for putting yourself out there and getting it right:

Gap's New Instagram Ad = Breastfeeding Perfection

Tue, 02/27/2018 - 15:29
Submitted by Carlin Ross

Not only do they show direct nipple contact and breast curve but they featured a woman of color breastfeeding her toddler.  This isn't a newborn baby but a child that's at least one years old.

When Grayson saw this image, he announced, "he's so cute".  Thank you, Gap for normalizing breastfeeding and normalizing breastfeeding your todder.  Grayson will be three this week and he still crawls into our bed in the mornings to nurse.  It's a commitment that's well worth it because he's never been sick.  Breast milk is nature's elixir.

Raising Happy, Grounded Self-Sexual Sons

Wed, 02/07/2018 - 10:51
Submitted by Carlin Ross

One of the most contentious posts on the site is a question sent to Betty by a pregnant mom, "How Do I Feminize My Son". Users went crazy because it seemed that this mom-to-be wanted to minimize her future son's masculinity. I think she chose an unfortunate title for her question. Now that I'm raising a boy I better understand what she really meant.

From Trauma to Orgasms

Sun, 12/31/2017 - 16:47
Submitted by Carlin Ross

Every Woman on the Planet Has Been Sexually Traumatized.

At best, we've been objectified, demeaned, shamed, guilted, and manipulated into believing that we don't deserve pleasure on our own terms. At worst, we've been groped, assaulted, raped and blamed for male lust. Betty and I have traveled the globe and there isn't a society or culture where women have true sexual equality. The clitoris is ignored. The female model of sexual response isn't even part of the discussion. Procreate sex reigns supreme. Female chastity and male dominance are the norm and, sadly, the rape culture persists.

Because Pleasure Creates Compassion

Thu, 12/14/2017 - 10:37
Submitted by Carlin Ross

Betty's been running workshops on and off for three decades. I've co-run about 40 workshops over the past five years. This past weekend's workshop was the best workshop we've ever done together.

I'm not sure whether it was the women...the new feminist swell of activism...our partnership but something seemed righter, more honest - special. I think that's how growth works. It just happens. You strive and struggle and push - give up - and then it just appears like an orgasm. You have to want more. You have to do the work. You have to accept failure. You have to keep going.